Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Struggling a bit

I knew at some point I was going to run smack dab into the wall of leaving what has been my sweet comfortable little home here and find myself facing the crap of 2009 head on. And boy oh boy I think I am there today.

Some stranger knocked on my door today to ask me if we were leaving and what was happening with the house and who could she call so her friend could live here.

I just about died.

I wanted to yell THIS IS MY HOUSE GO AWAY! We got married when we lived here. I got pregnant here. Jack took his first steps here. So much has happened here.

And then I got to the corner of the basement that is holding Jack's tiny baby things.

Tiny baby things that earlier this spring I thought would have another baby in them this month.

GAH!

Plus whatever it is that is keeping me from being able to stay pregnant also means I am having some terrible hormonal issues.

Sigh.

Hard day.

Hard day.

Hard day.

Tomorrow will be easier...right?

This is a journey Sarah.

This is a journey and one day soon I will find myself on the other side of this portion wondering what all the fuss was about.

14 comments:

  1. (((extra hugs))) coming from West MI!

    ReplyDelete
  2. *hugs* just remember you're on the home stretch of moving and then you'll have 2010 to relax and get over that at least. You've come SO FAR!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. It is ok. Our lives are not perfect. Blogging seems mostly to be about things. But we are people. Life happens and it isn't always pretty. Let it out dear.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sending great big hugs and prayers your way. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, honey, what a day!! Big hugs, and take it day by day. That's all you can do.

    ReplyDelete
  6. One step at a time. That, and a day in PJs.

    ReplyDelete
  7. *hugs*

    It is a journey. And somehow this journey makes us stronger. But not without a bit of kicking and screaming along the way...

    ReplyDelete
  8. Take a deep breath! You are under A LOT of stress and that definately has a lot to do with the pregnancy issue, I'm sure. Once you get all settled into your beautiful new home and have a chance to relax things will get so much better. I know it's hard to leave a place of comfort that you have been in for a while, but look at the adventure that lies ahead! Prayers and blessings.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hang in there, kitten. I have a friend who says that odd numbered years are just that . . . ODD. So here's to 2010 being a fabulous year all around.

    hugs

    ReplyDelete
  10. 'm always saying "I wish we could move!" But then I realize that this is my house - the kid was born here, our first house, beloved cat buried in the backard, etc. If I did move, it would have to be miles away so I couldn't see it every day. So, I understand how you must feel.

    Hopefully a year from now you will be all setteld in, the house busting with glitter and vintage ornaments. And you will be happy!@

    ReplyDelete
  11. Oh Sarah, take a deep breath and soldier on.
    Sending lots of positive thoughts your way
    Take care
    Alison

    ReplyDelete
  12. Oh my... emotions just overwhelm at times. Yes, those tiny baby things do that when you had other plans for them... all the baby girl dresses I had finally had to be given away... I was too upset to have them in the house.

    Hope it's all going to ease up soon and you'll find some peace and blessing with your sweet son and hubby! Hang in there!
    Hugs, Kim

    ReplyDelete
  13. I think that your last paragraph is really true, but it doesn't make those hard days any easier, does it? It was so hard leaving our house in State College - we got engaged, married, pregnant there. Katrina did her first everything in babydom there. It was so, so hard. But there is bliss on the other side. And I am convinced that there will be bliss for you too.

    Sending lots of love your way.

    ReplyDelete
  14. The year is almost over:) Think of all the fab new memories you will be making in your beautiful new home! I get sad every time I move too!

    ReplyDelete

Hi there. What say you?