Monday, February 08, 2010

And so it goes

Saw nothing on the U/S today but an empty sac. The fetal pole is already gone, not a heartbeat in sight.

When given the choice between keep waiting (reportedly up to a month?) or just have the D&C, I chose the D&C.

Surgery on Wednesday.

Scared shitless to be frank. I can handle this other stuff, but surgery? Scary.

Still feeling like crap, totally out of sorts, anxious and well? to be honest sort of in hell.

Tired. Can't sleep at all.

What a nightmare this is all turning out to be.

I will be back when I am off the hormonal rollercoaster from hell.

Thanks for the good thoughts/prayers and lovely emails.

They do mean a lot to me.

40 comments:

  1. I am so sorry. Will pray for you by name on Wednesday.

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  2. I know this is scary, and my heart aches for you. I'm so sorry. Really big hugs

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  3. so sorry!!! Ask for drugs before the surgery to calm you down
    ;) take care and know you are in my thoughts!

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  4. I'm so very very sorry. Please know you are in my thoughts and prayers.

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  5. I am so so sorry...big hugs and prayers.

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  6. Got you in my prayers this week! I can only imagine how sad and frustrated you must be. Hang in there!

    Molly

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  7. there aren't any words that will ease your pain. just know that we are all thinking of you and are here for you when you need a shoulder.

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  8. Oh Sarah. I am so so sorry! I was really cheering for you and hoping everything would be okay.
    You'll be in my thoughts and prayers on Wednesday. xoxo

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  9. I'm so sorry Sarah. ;-(

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  10. I was thinking good thoughts for you today. So sorry to hear the news, and will continue to hold you in my thoughts for Wednesday...

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  11. Sarah, I'm so sorry... I hope it helps just a little to know that we're all thinking of you...

    ~ Jennifer

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  12. Oh Sarah,

    I am so sorry. You're in my thoughts and prayers along with your sweet husband and little Jack.

    xo-Mel

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  13. Please be strong and keep in my mind that God is around. You need to help yourself too.

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  14. I send you hugs and prayers.

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  15. As my son would say, "I think this is a good time to say sh*t!" I'm so sorry to hear this. Life is mysterious and painful and beautiful and all those things all at once. I'm sorry for your loss. I hope the surgery goes smoothly and that your general optimism is merely bruised and not broken. Take care!

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  16. Paulette6:58 AM

    My heart goes out to you. I am very sorry.

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  17. Anonymous7:27 AM

    Sarah,
    Just wanted you to know that I've been lurking on your blog for about a month now and have really enjoyed looking at your pictures and reading about you. I don't usually comment, but I wanted you to know that I'm sorry you are suffering right now. I believe in prayer and I will be praying for you this week. God Bless. Katie in Pittsburgh PA

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  18. Oh Sarah, I have been waiting for an update but this is most certainly not the one I was hoping for. :( I'm so very sorry for you and Dave and I wish you strength and peace. You'll be in my thoughts.

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  19. Anonymous8:20 AM

    I'm so sorry for your loss -You're in my thoughts & prayers - Dee in BC

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  20. I am so sorry. The surgery itself is not a big deal but...my heart aches for you.

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  21. i'm so sorry. my best friend partially miscarried a few weeks ago and had to have the D&C when the meds they gave her to complete it failed. i did some research and found that it's one of the most common surgeries performed on women (everything from abortions to irregular periods). the surgery is rather short and you can go back to "normal" activities within a few days. my friend had stomach tenderness for a few days and very minimal bleeding. she went back to work a week later.

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  22. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. I'm so sorry.

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  23. Anonymous11:41 AM

    I am so sorry. Good thought coming your way. Take care of you. B.

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  24. Big hugs to you. So very sorry for your loss. I know how much it hurts. Good luck tomorrow. They aren't that bad, as far as surgeries go.
    Hope the weather isn't hitting you all like it is hitting here in SE Wisconsin.

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  25. Sarah, I am so sorry. Please do not worry about the procedure. I had one many years ago, it was quick and afterward I had cramps but nothing horrible. Don't be afraid. I'm sending you warm hugs.
    Colleen

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  26. I am so sad to read your post today and sorry for your loss. I am sending you lots of good thoughts and warm fuzzies.

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  27. Praying for you, big hugs!!!!!

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  28. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I've worn those shoes,and sometimes they hurt.

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  29. I am so. SO. SO. Sorry. I'm sending the biggest hugs that I can to you. I hope you can feel their silent comfort through the miles.
    ~Kristin

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  30. Sarah, i am so sorry to hear about this...i am sad for you and your husband...sending hugs and a prayer your way

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  31. I am so sorry Sarah. Take your time and heal, and you're in my thoughts and prayers.

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  32. I am so sorry for your loss. Good luck with the procedure, I will keep you in my thoughts.

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  33. :( I am so sorry, Sarah. I prayed for you yesterday and will continue to pray for a good recovery, physically and emotionally. xoxo

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  34. I am so sorry. I am praying for you and your family. This is a great loss. I hope you feel love from all who love you.

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  35. My daughter in law just went through the same thing and said the hormone trip was horrible! I am so sorry that you are having to deal with this......but, it will pass with time. That is the only upside to your situation. You are in my prayers and thoughts. Hope things straighten out soon. Artful hugs.....

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  36. Hang in there sweetie! We are rootin' for you.

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  37. Thinking of you Sarah...

    Deanna

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