Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Parenting with a purpose

When we had parent teacher conferences back in October I had a little lightbulb moment while talking with Jack's teacher. His gifted teacher has him fill out a personal inventory at the end of gifted days and I was surprised by some of the things he writes on those.

So I decided to try out an idea I saw on a blog not too long ago, a between you and me book with him.

I was really hoping that since Jack finds it very difficult to discuss his emotions that he might be more comfortable writing them down for me.
So far this is NOT what I would call a win. I write him little letters and that is pretty much the end of it.

He will write back if I request it, but not of his own volition. And even then he tends to just answer the question I have asked and that is the end of it.

I still think this is an idea worth exploring, but I am not sure of where to go with it next? He most certainly needs encouragement from me, and it is providing a very concrete method of delivering that. But I really still want to work on his expression of emotions...


Parenting is certainly becoming a more purposeful exercise with him as he grows instead of those "fly by the seat of your pants and hope to live through another day" days of yore.

In other news, I bit the built and cut up the hankies. (Those of you who have been hanging out here awhile know that was H - A - R - D! for me)

And then I hit a brick wall.

I am still sorting out how exactly I am going to put this together into a quilt.

I am afraid of messing it up! LOL


  1. I cut some of my hankies up too a year or so ago, I made a blouse for myself. I love wearing it to antique stores or better yet quilt shows!

  2. On the hanky quilt. I see pinwheels on a white background with sashing. But perhaps instead of seaming the hanky squares you "applique" them to the top of the white fabric to keep the variety of hanky edges visible.

  3. Carrie and I kept a journal like that when she was in third grade - I still have it. (Actually she wrote in it the day George Bush gave his 'Mission Accomplished' speech about how excited she was the war was over - how SAD is that?) Where was I? Anyway, I am glad we did it, and for the most part we tried to keep it fun and not too serious. Many of our entries featured talking cats.

  4. I am reading an amazing book called Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline. It has changed my life in terms of working with Hank and, well, everybody I know. The focus is all about teaching kids to express and then process their emotions. It's ok to feel mad/sad/etc., but then what comes next? Some kids learn this as easy as their ABCs just by observing those around them, while some kids struggle with dealing with the strong emotions they feel (heck, some adults do). I haven't even made it through the whole book, but in just 2 short weeks Hank has gone from being the problem kid in his class to a model for keeping his hands to himself and not flipping out even if somebody pushes/provokes him first. The book is not just for toddlers -- in fact it is mostly geared towards 5-10 year olds. I am learning a lot about myself, too, and why I respond the way I do to things. Anyway, maybe you already read it, or aren't into self help books, but almost everybody I talk to about it is excited to check the book out.

  5. I have desperately tried with my sons' teachers to drag their emotions out. I finally did it by asking what they like to do. For instance. My question to my youngest son would be...What kind of house would you build if you could build it with legos and what would it look like? Where as with my daughter we can't get her to stop writing (I don't know where she gets that!). Kudos for always challenging him. The quilt looks amazing...good luck! Renee

  6. Jack is pretty artistic. Maybe he would do an artist's portfolio instead. Draw what he enjoys first. Then he may draw other feelings. Eventually, he may start writing his feelings. Good luck!

  7. Loving the hankie quilt thus far!!! Can't wait to see it finished....
    But seriously regarding Jack--he sounds so much like me as a me maybe I can enlighten you on how firey little red heads can be, even though my hair was white blond when I was his turned red as I got older! I had so many of the same issues...


Hi there. What say you?