Tuesday, December 30, 2008

A year of mothering

This year with Jack has been incredibly hard.

But somehow, somewhere, in the midst of all the tears and drama, I feel like I found my mothering footing. That "instinctual, no bullshit, take it or leave it, one way or another we are going to get out of this mess" ground. (At least for now, ask me again in 3 years.)

And that part was good.

And necessary.

It probably sounds weird, but in some ways this year really made me "Jack's mother." I mean it's easy to be a mother when they are cute and cuddly and squishy and just need diapers and milk. But when the shit really hits the fan (and it did - many, many more times than we talked about here this year), you have to dig deep, ya know?

I dug deeper than I thought I could and here I am on the other side. Calmer even. Letting go and going with the flow as much as I can.

So, here's to a year where my kid became a kid, and not my "baby" anymore:

January, we learned how to use scissors
February, we played in the snow
March, we played Easter bunny
April, we visited with grandma and grandpa Phoenix
May, we flew a kite for the first time
June, we rode the big train in Kansas
July, we hit the pinnacle of insanity, had a big blow out with the dog lady, and found that the only magic we needed was hiding in cousin Liam
August, we played with nasty bugs
September, we went golfing for the first time
October, we always have fun at the pumpkin farm
November, we had our very own world's cutest kid Christmas photo shoot
And today, December 30, it was 70 degrees and we went to the zoo with our "friends."
And it was the best day ever.

(We've also started reading and writing, coloring in the lines, sharing, making friends all the time, talking to strangers, riding a bike, bowling, playing tee-ball, learning manners, using the potty, dressing yourself, going to the movies, and much, much more.)


  1. Awww it's amazing how much they change in 365 days!
    Try not to blink... :)Lisa

  2. I was just thinking about you the other day and thought to myself "aside from the box of ornaments, Sarah hasn't had any "Jack" moments recently (that you've blogged about). Growing up is grand. And I *promise, promise, promise* 4 is sssooo much easier than 3. 5 ~ well, the attitude starts at 5. You know, the "I'm way too cool to have to actually listen to my mom" attitude. I'll let ya know what 6 brings! :-) Happy New Year!!

  3. What a big year! Guess what? Next year will be even bigger! I'm NOT saying more difficult though! And you will grow even more as a mother...because that's the type of person you are. :) Enjoy 2009!!!!

  4. Great Post Sarah...I still wonder if I'll ever come out on the other side!

  5. Great work to both of you! xo

  6. What a life changing year. I raised me son alone for 7 years and I went from a tiny door mouse to a lion but only roared when necessary. There are not instructions pinned to babies when they are born. It takes allot of fortitude and prayer ! Your little Jack is going to be a very handsome man someday, I can tell from his photos.

  7. what a fun recap of your year. i'm jealous of your 70 degree day. it's COLD here.

  8. glad to hear that you feel like you make it to the other side of the rough spots.

    i am curious about jack learning to read. cosmo is just over 3, and seems close to "getting it" and is VERY interested, but it seems so early to expect actual reading. i'd love to hear more about it, either in a post or email: kayte8 at gee mail dot com. thanks!

  9. Anonymous11:02 AM

    Your energy is an inspiration. It really is a hard job isn't it, if you're going to do it right? The twins are starting to play and discover and I know that soon they'll crawl and get into everything...Jack is a little love. All snips and snails. Don't you wonder what he'll be like as a young man? Vicki

  10. Happy New Year Sarah and Jack!! Enjoy these years. They go so fast and soon your baby will be old enough to drive and you'll be wondering where the time went! Big hugs!!

  11. Oh I love remembering the year with Jack. So sweet. Lovely memories for you. I hate to tell you this Sarah but as the mom of adults - it don't get easier. In fact no matter what you can't stop living with their adult problems with them. And those things are sometimes more than I can take. There is good too. My kids are really my best friends. Er, ah, well some of them - the ones that have accepted adulthood instead of continuing to act like irrestponsible children! Sorry I'm going off now on a tangent.

  12. you guys have been busy! what a year?! looks like you two had some great times in '08. :)

    The Chic Life

  13. Love the photos of Jack thru the year. My fav is the one with the kite. Happy 2009!

  14. It looks to me like Jack has had a great year... and a very good Mama. Keep up the good work and the "no bullshit" rule. Your instincts will be right.

  15. This post just warms me up all over. I am glad that you are working your way through to the other side of the mountain. May the coming year be better and better.

  16. I feel like I'm looking at my next year with Ned while reading this post. Peter has been such and amiable toddler and Ned is...well, not. I hope to weather it well, as you have!


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