Road Trip!

Before I even start the post I should mention that I changed the blog up a bit. New header, different colors, new links, etc. When I came here to post I thought I was on the wrong blog. Ha. I am a goofball.
Anyway.

I am in need of some adventure. In the past two months I have been spent so much time in this house, lying in bed or working. I needed to get out.

So yesterday we got up early, early and went to Nashville for their big flea market. It's been on our to do list for years, why not now?

It was not fabulous, but it's winter. Our own flea market is lucky to have 5 brave guys out there right now, so it was a welcome change. The prices were crazy high in my opinion, but I did buy a few things which I will show you tomorrow.

How about we look at things I didn't buy? LOL
Loads of chandeliers. They were all lovely and crazy expensive. Even a super duper tiny one was $150. I guess she doesn't know that the blue one I painted last weekend cost me a fiver. Snort.
Someone painted this one already, but the color is pretty bad. If I had liked the style of it more I would have bought it and repainted it, but I didn't love the leaves.
These were awesome. Huge and no clue what anyone would do with them, but awesome.
There were a lot of sweet quilts. But again with the prices. I think this was $125. Honestly you can buy this stuff a lot cheaper on Ebay. But don't tell anyone I told you so.
This chandelier would have been mine in a New York minute. I would have even paid a pretty penny for it. But yea, the price was $225! Come on now. Is there something in the water down here?*
The box of mismatched silver was cheap enough, but I have a drawer full already.

Let's look at few things that I think you should show your husband if he moans about the latest thing you have drug home from the thrift/flea. Just say, "Wellll, I could have bought that!"
This "lamp" was insane. First it is HUGE. Look at the shade that man is carrying! Second it was a B I G pile of sticks all twisted together with a tiny light bulb thrown on top of it. It gave us a good laugh the first time we saw it, but when I saw these folks proudly escorting it home I almost died. (DO click the photo to enlarge it.)

Mean, mean, mean, I know.

Don't want a big weird lamp?
How about a big weird Komodo dragon instead? That thing is big enough to eat Jack. It could have been yours for only $675.
We stopped in Metropolis IL on the way home. Dave and I have been here once before on a road trip and we wanted Jack to see the giant superman. He was a good sport about taking photos. (For once, lol.)
I should have stood a little closer so you could see his sassy pose. Ha.

It was nice to have a little unexpected adventure on a chilly Feb. weekend. I should try that every year!

*I've been to flea markets all over the world. Some are certainly more expensive than others. I would expect prices like this at an "antique show", but not a flea market where half the stuff was fake purses and imported sweat socks and stuff like that. Despite the prices, it was fun to look.

Making

It's been a really long time since I made anything other than my heart to heart valentines.

I am trying to ease myself back into being creative.
I've been working on Eggs for Shara's swap.

I think this might be a purple year for me after all.
And I finally made Jack a new place mat. He had a plastic one that was doing the job of protecting those wood countertops, but I threw it in the dishwasher and warped it. He said it was making him spill his milk so I tossed it.

After he got paint ALL over said countertops yesterday I kicked it into gear and made him a new placemat.

I had forgotten a few things. 1 - quilting takes a long freaking time! Even on a placemat. (There is quite a lot of quilting, but it's hard to see in my crappy photo). 2 - Playing with print and pattern in fabric is fun! And 3 - the shhhhhhhhh shhhhhh of the needle passing through fabric is cathartic.

Last, but not least, Jack choose a name for the heart to heart giveaway. Congratulations to WENDY!

Me and my paintbrush

This house is so much bigger than our last house (almost double the size), so I spent some time last fall acquiring things to fill it up a bit.

Moving in mid winter means there are a lot of things around here waiting for warmer weather so I can work a little paint magic on them.

The things that can be done with spray paint are slowly getting done every time we have an afternoon in the upper 40's, like this past Saturday.
I always paint all of the chandeliers white. Always. They always start as hideous brass things and I slather them with white spray paint.

And then on Saturday I painted this one blue.

I am getting bored with my usual color routine. It seems like I paint everything we own white or green 1 or green 2 or blue . Oh, and occasionally pink .

Let's ponder painting some of this stuff!
I bought this at a thrift in the fall for $30. I LOVE that scalloped edge. It needs fresh paint and different knobs on the doors for sure. (My grandparents stained glass is leaning against the wall, also waiting for paint on the frames.)

I am thinking about painting inside the cabinet a different color than the rest of it. But what color? White on the outside and pink on the inside?

I have no ideas...
I bought this table at a garage sale many moons ago even though there was absolutely no room for it in the old house. I loved it's girly shape.

But right now it is kind of, well, nude colored. Blech. It's the first thing you see when you walk in the front door and originally I was thinking blue. Our front door is blue too.
Dave has been bugging me for years to paint the pie safe. I resisted. But the pine is getting really discolored and the cats and Jack have really torn up the screens. Since we are going to replace the screen with chicken wire, we might as well paint it.

You can see I tried out both blue and surprise! green. LOL

Last week I stuck a lavender paint chip on it because I really want to paint something lavender, but the purple does not work with the creamy white in our room at all. (Sadly it doesn't work well with the yellow everywhere else either.)
Dave and I bought this chair at an auction before Jack was born I think. I need to fix the caning on it desperately (not sure where to buy that stuff??) and make a new seat cushion. It needs a new coat of paint too.

White for sure on this one, since it is in the pink bathroom.
Speaking of bathrooms. I choose a grayish white for the hall bath. The grout is gray, everything else is white. It looks kinda purply though and frankly both Dave and I hate it. The night before he left we started auditioning a few paint chips in there.

These colors are all pretty good.

But here is my real problem:
I KNOW that if I choose one of them I am going to hate it in 2 months. Anytime I stray away from my usual style or color palette I get sick of it very quickly. If I stick to the stuff that I KNOW I love it seems to stick around here a lot longer.

I really wanted to branch out a bit in the new house. Stretch my legs a little. Try on a simpler style. Something less "collected" or "cottagey" or "girly" or "shabby". Something more like Pottery Barn instead of Flea Market. (I do not want to be the girl still hanging on to 1980's geese in 2010 if you know what I mean. LOL)

But Dave and I keep saying to each other "this house is missing something" or "this house just does not feel right yet". After spending hours yesterday pouring over the new Flea Market Style magazine, I honestly think it is because I tried too hard to make my style simpler. (Even though my best girlfriend will tell you this house is very *me*. And it is. Just a lot.more.sparse.)

How about you? Do you stick to the tried and true? Have you successfully tried something new in your living style? How do you keep what works for you feeling fresh and not like 1980's geese?

I should just paint it all blue or green or pink or white shouldn't I? :-)

A Posie Pin Tutorial

For today's post, Katie , from Katie Jean, has very generously supplied a tutorial for you so you can make your very own Posie Pins. (You can also enter the give away to win one made by Katie just for you!)

Thank you Katie!
I love making these flower brooches. It is such a fun way for me to make something that adds a little bit of surprise to my outfit. Plus, they are quick and easy too!
First you draw a little petal pattern. Mine is 2 1/2”. Cut it out then draw the petal outline onto the back of your chosen fabric. I made nine petals for this pin. Cut them each out.
With a needle and a double strand of thread, make a running stitch around the bottom of each petal. It feels like they are each being strung together for a necklace.
Then pull the thread tightly and gather the petals closely. This will make a little gathered circle. Knot the end of your thread. Then close the flower with a up and down stitch through the inner circle of the gathered flower. Don't worry about being too neat. Knot your thread again and cut.
Pick out a bit of ribbon and a few buttons. Sew the buttons on with the ribbon underneath, making sure to catch it with a few stitches.
For the back of the pin, cut a small square out of felt that will cover the under stitching. Sew on a pin backing to the felt. Use a hot glue gun to attach the felt to the fabric flower. Let it cool.

You are finished! Attach your newest accessory to a bright pink cardigan and surprise everyone around you with your craftiness!

Heart to heart giveaway

I've been trying to wait until bloglines* can get itself together and work properly again to post this, but I have other stuff I am dying to show you already!

The final two heart to heart swappers very generously sent along an extra Valentine so we could share them with you!
I love this little banner from Michaele so much.
Isn't it sweet?
I hung it up my hall mirror the very second I opened the box.

And these sweet Posie pins from Katie Jean are so wonderful too! I just know it is going to brighten up your winter days. (Particularly on your coat, where I am wearing mine!)

The winner will receive both the banner and the pin (and perhaps one of my valentines if I can manage to get another one made, no promises there though).

You only need to leave a comment to enter, no hoop jumping required. Please make sure there is a way for me to contact you or you will be disqualified.

Oh yea, and if you have managed to find a copy of Flea Market Style (that new mag everyone is talking about) could you tell me where you found it? I know it's a few days early, but no one around here is committed to selling it and I want it!

*I gave up on bloglines and moved my feeds to google reader. I will admit I do not love google reader, but at least the darn thing works. Here are easy directions on how to move your feeds in a few minutes time.

Heart to Heart 2010

For at least two years now Shara and I have been talking easter egg swaps. And look! Finally there is going to be one. Wouldn't you like to join in on the Eggstra Fun Swap? I am already tossing around ideas after the Olympics are over every night. :-)

Another batch of Valentines:
Courtney made us these awesome little jellybean packets. You know my jellybeans are already in Jack's belly, right? LOL
And Tiff made these sweet cones with clay heart pins that were stuffed with chocolates. (Already in *my* belly of course.)
Julie made us sweet little bird bookmarks. (Or penguins, if you are the Jack attack.) Chirp chirp!
Breanna made these wonderful furry little lambs with tags that said "Would 'ewe' be mine?" (It's hard to get Jack to leave this one alone!)

Only 2 more Valentines left to share and a giveaway to go with them!

Heart to Heart 2010

Yesterday was completely overwhelming. Today promises to be a much quieter day.

So let's get on with the parade of Valentines, shall we? (I need to put all this Valentine stuff away at some point, ha.)
Mel always makes the loveliest things. These are so pretty and sparkly and you know I love the glass button in the middle!
Jeanette sent these cute altered bingo cards. I am going to hang mine from the Valentine tree with a clothespin!
Oh man, teeny tiny pom pom trim? I'm in. Thanks to Hope for these cuties.
Jessi made everyone these sweet felt heart ornaments. I always love it when there is just a "little" variation in what they send because I get first choice! :-) (Although it is often very hard to choose one.) I choose another glass button of course.
And a minute to brag a little...Jack laid down with me the other day and read all 5 chapters of Flat Stanley. I couldn't be more proud of him. A chapter book 6 months before he even starts kindergarten!

Awesome.

Those test results

Hi. My name is Sarah and I have had three miscarriages in the last 10 months.

This has fundamentally changed me*.

Today I went to the OB for my D&C follow up.

I tested positive for MTHFR .

And then I cried.

A lot.

Hysterically.

I cried tears of relief. I have something wrong with me. Not just bad luck.

And I cried tears of sorrow. This is all just so fucking hard. So many losses. So much struggling.

And then my OB actually smiled. He has not been able to smile at me once in all of this. Because he is hopeful that with aspirin and mega loads of folic acid and clomid and progesterone that I can have a baby.

And then I cried some more because I am still so freaking scared.

Will I ever see that positive HPT and think it will be ok again?

Do I have it in me to go on?

I think I do.

I think I saw the tiniest bit of hope in those 20 pages of test results.

We have a few months of waiting before we can try again. A few months to get my head around all of this.

I still very much want another baby.

I still hope this is only the beginning of that story and not the end.

* I think it is worth mentioning that I feel it is important for women to talk about this stuff. With other women and with men. Infertility seems to be one of those topics that makes everyone feel uncomfortable. I absolutely know that I am not alone in this struggle. And I know that some of you are more comfortable sharing your own struggles than others.

When people see me with Jack it is obvious that I "am his mother". What is not obvious is my battle with secondary infertility. I have decided to wear it for the world, in much the same way that I wear my "mother of Jack" badge for the world.

Until now I have not discussed this with my family, or the people at church, or the friends who are wondering what in the hell is going on with me. I am here to say those days are done.

At the hospital they ask you over and over again "How many times have you been pregnant?" and that number was KILLING me.

Four.

So. I am Sarah. I have been pregnant four times. I have one child and three losses.

And I hope that is not the end of this part of my story.

Heart to heart 2010

I am starting to feel a little better. I actually did something today (laundry, toilet cleaning, vacuuming, but still, I did something. However, I have the self clean cycle running on the oven and I am pretty sure it is about to gas me out of the house. Holy hell that stinks.)

So let's start the parade of Valentines from the 2010 Heart to heart swap shall we?I am in LOVE with these sweet chalkboard hearts from Jane . She outdoes herself every year! If you pop on over to her blog she will show how she made them.
I had to laugh when I saw these cuties given that I did a bee mine theme too. Great minds think alike? These lovelies are from my local partner in crime, Gail . She makes seriously gorgeous stuff but you need to go visit her blog and put pressure on her to ACTUALLY BLOG. Ahem. LOL
I actually jumped up and down squealing when I saw these from Shara . I mean come on! The awesomeness is almost too much.
D sent these super cute cookie coasters and I had one heck of a hard time choosing one! Way too cute to put dirty old food on though, I am going to hang mine on the Valentine tree.

Hopefully the rest of those packages are going to arrive today ladies!

I will be back tomorrow with more of the valentines and I have a little giveaway when we are all done. :-)

Valentines

Despite the fact that I hauled my very crabby post-op self to the post office to mail the Heart to Heart boxes priority mail so they would arrive for Valentine's Day, most of them have not yet been received. Boo.

So instead of ruining the surprise and starting the parade of Valentines today, how about we look at some sweet presents that have made their way to me lately?
Jack made me a jewelry organizer at the Lowe's workshop yesterday. Here he is INSISTING that he does not know how to smile. Ha. Isn't he sweet?
Dave reportedly had to hunt high and low for a company that still makes fancy candy boxes, but he found one!
I also asked for flowers this year. Something I never ask for, but flowers are nice in this giant new house. (Which really feels OH SO BIG lately.)

I will fully admit that one of the best parts of hosting the heart to heart swap are the sweet little extras in the boxes. Here are a few of them:
two.matching.feedsacks! from Shara ;
a super sweet heart made with tiny yo-yo's from Tiff ;
a sweet little altered sock stuff with all kinds of goodness from Mel ;
and not only did Breanna send me two strands of glass garland which I have been playing with...
but she sent these REALLY, REALLY fabulous crepe paper books which kept me entertained for many hours when I was lying in bed.

There was also a lovely pink shawl (Thanks Courtney!), some yummy candy (thanks Jane!) and more. Can you believe how spoiled I was? Thank you all. (Jack would thank you all for his little treasures too, but he is too busy arguing with his father in the other room right now. That kid.)

And just wait until you see the Valentines they came up with this year. It *might* just be the best year yet...

Happy Valentine's Day to you and yours. :-)

I'm here

Hi there.

Here I am.

Surgery went ok. It was pretty easy actually, as far as surgery goes. I had to do a lot of advocating for myself about what I did and not want as far as anesthesia and pain medicine (which I actually did not need at all), but that's ok I suppose.

The hormonal roller coaster from hell is starting. If anyone has any brilliant ideas (pharmaceutical or herbal) about how to help myself through this part I am all ears. I find the incessant crying really, really bothersome. Weird perhaps? I don't know. I just want to get on with my life. I want to feel REGULAR.

I hadn't even been home from surgery 10 minutes when Jackson's preschool was on the phone. He had an accident which resulted in him losing a little chunk of his cornea. Again. (I swear he does not blink appropriately, but the doctor just shrugs.) I was COMPLETELY unprepared for dealing with him crying in pain for 12 hours after I just had that damn surgery.

That was seriously hard. I felt all out of control like "SOMEONE PLEASE HELP MY BABY" while feeling totally unable to do anything about it myself other than have him lie on top of me.

And then the damn cat had diarrhea and she had poop ALL OVER herself. So here I was running after her, gagging from this damn antibiotic from hell, trying to not cry, and dealing with poop everywhere.

It makes me laugh now, but it was so not funny on Thursday.

In other news:
I won this quilt on Ebay and while I had it spread it out so I could admire it from my couch last week I thought my fat, fluffy white cat looked yummy on it.
I mailed the heart to heart boxes this week and this was my contribution this year. I made glass bead forget me not bouquets with little glass bead bees.
Photos suck, but whatever, life is hard right now. Ha. These things took forever to make and they were hard because, well, I was pregnant and gagging and exhausted and really having to push through.

Sigh.

The never ending "pregnant, not pregnant, pregnant, not pregnant" thing is hard to deal with.

Anyway.

The olympics are starting tonight. That is usually big excitement for us, and we watch every minute we can. (Except right now I am so damn sick of the tv after doing nothing but lying on the couch watching tv for a month.)

I need some kind of project to keep my hands and heart and mind busy, but I wander around like a zombie totally unable to make a decision about what to even work on.

This too shall pass...

So. That about sums up my ever exciting life from my couch. Thanks for checking in on me. It keeps from me wallowing quite as much.