Grant 7 months

 7 months my Ginty!

 Let's see, what are you up to?

*Sitting up
*shrieking
*sleeping in the crib at night and about 50% of naps
*still nursing (just twice a day, mama is anticipating the doctor saying she needs serious drugs next week)
*eating food and loving it
*starting to babble (nonononono mamamamama and some kind of nonsense babble which is something like manobadodobamano)
*frowning less
*getting better at being left alone
*in love with your siblings, they sure can make you laugh
*not a great lover of the exersaucer
*HUGE. Seriously huge. 3 lbs lighter than Sammi and only 4 inches shorter. Wearing 18 month clothing.
*sporting a natural mohawk
*in love with eating paper (shades of Jack there, ahem)
*spitting up a lot suddenly
*starting to make the "what the hell is wrong with you people?" face
*love, love "scritching" with your fingers on everything
*still not great at just going to sleep when you are tired
*finally have clear skin, can I keep it that way?
*my sweet, chubby, red haired, blue eyed boy.

Love ya baby,
Mama

Flea Market Sundays

I used to consider a perfect junking morning one that included ornaments, tablecloths and quilts (and pottery). Now? Quilts*, doll houses** (or doll related stuff), and ornaments/fabric are running neck in neck.

It was a perfect junking morning today:

A few ornaments. (I saw more, but I have become pretty picky about price.)

A corner shelf (which promptly went into the play kitchen area.)

An Irmi coat rack!!!! This has been on wish list FOREVER.

And the matching light switch cover.

Pile of sweet old books...

some of which have Target price tags for 22 cents. We googled, they are from the first Target stores, which opened in 1962. That's pretty cool in itself. I can't imagine books in Target for 22 cents. Also that yellow one is Captain Kangaroo. Man I loved that show when I was a kid.

And this. I died. This is a Jayline dollhouse. There was one at the flea I was lusting after but it was so pricey ($85!). And not in great condition at that price either. I googled and googled, ebayed, etsy'ed, and could never come up with another one.

And then, this morning, there she was. She is missing the bathroom walls (but actually in better condition than the $85 one). For $10. I nearly ran away cheering. Jayline houses are hard to come by.

This also had me nearly running away cheering. I LOVE LOVE LOVE a certain style of vintage baby quilt from the '40's. They were made from kits and have a very particular look. They are always way out of my pocket range. (Upwards of $50+ here, one of the most expensive quilts to buy in this area.)

 I saw this lying in a pile and asked how much. Oh dear, I am afraid to tell you.

Sweet dancing rabbits.

COME ON.

$2.

Faint dead.

:-)

Man it was worth getting up damn early in the cold and drizzle today.

*I have actually started thinking about which quilt patterns I would like to add to my collection. Not that I will ever stop randomly collecting pretty ones that I can afford but there are few patterns I would REALLY like to have. An affordable yo-yo quilt is near the top of the list. Second is a nice lantern quilt. Third? I think I want something unusual - donkeys, or a letter quilt. I just love Shara's R quilt. I also need a good small star one, hmmmm.

** I am seriously considering packing away the pottery collection for awhile and having Dave redo the living room shelves to hold my doll houses. Maybe I am over pottery? Not sure. But with little kids I am enjoying the doll houses a lot more.

Never, ever getting back together

A few weeks ago Dave and I decided to buy the two little kids a nicer play kitchen. Sammi likes "cookin" with her dollies, so it's in the corner of the dining room for now. I was super keen on sewing her some things for the play kitchen, so I ordered this cute fabric for her.

I bought the full yard. But man, when it arrived the thought of putting together ALL THOSE FIDDLY TOYS with my very sore fingers? Yea. Blah. I did make a lot of them into stuffies.

But I also put some of them on play sized flour sack towels I made for her.

And then I turned some more of them into placemats for us.

She has been carrying some of them around for a few days, particularly the ice cream and cupcakes, which she calls "shakes."

Some of them I just plain didn't deal with at all. I was going to put one on a shirt for her or use it on an apron. But honestly, after spending many, many hours* with those things I am never, ever getting back together with them. Over them I am. LOL

*I am having a hard time finding my hour a day to create again. Partially because of pain and exhaustion (which means some days I can only make things for 30 minutes before I have to stop) and partially because of the insanity of the wild things and every day life.

The one where we meet the geneticist

 Last Thursday we hauled the two littles in the pouring down rain downtown to Children's Hospital.

 I want to say before I say anything else that if you ever think your life is full of worries you should just haul yourself to your local children's hospital. I was sure that at any moment I was going to burst into tears seeing all those sick kids and babies. Dave said he felt silly being there with our Ginty (Sam calls him "g'nt" and it's kind of stuck), but I said our very level headed ped wanted this sorted out, so sort it out I shall.

 We were there for many hours. And I completely ignored the silly med student when she tried to say she felt some difference in the two sides of his jaw. (The physical therapist we saw the day before said she felt pretty sure the difference in his face was from torticollis.)

 When the geneticist finally arrived she looked him over, asked a few questions, measured the heads of Dave and Sammi (GIANT) and declared him genetically normal aside from a congenitally large head. She said his cheek difference was likely due to the torticollis and that he had no other signs of hemifacial macrosomia.

In the time since all of this started I have been working on his physical therapy with him and he is sitting up much better. And sleeping most of the time in his crib. He is still leaning in this photos, but not nearly as much. We will see the PT lady again in a week.

And me?  I could cry from relief. I felt sure he did not have HFM, but it was a long week or so thinking there might be something very wrong with my baby.

Also I am mad. It seems like from the moment Grant was born there has been a line of people who want to declare this, that and the other wrong with him. And I honestly do not understand why. No one ever acted this way with the other two kids. In fact, something really WAS wrong with Jack and it took me 6 solid months to find a doctor to help us.

Frustrating. And I have a strong feeling this is not the end of it.

Anyway. For now my Ginty is back to being his grumpy self and I am focused on finding people who can fix whatever the hell is wrong with me. Onward and upward!

Flea Market Sunday

Flea market Sunday time again. Where did this week go?

A potholder and a stuffed frog from a neighbor's garage sale.

Doll quilt.

Haven't bought a tablecloth in a loooooooooong time, but the polka dots called me.

This is hot pink and a super soft thick old satin. Probably a dance costume, I think I will pull it out around Halloween.

I have tons of old nativity figures, but not a single creche! This complete set was still in it's box.

A big tin barn.

Love.

A whole pile of graduated paper mache bells with white glitter on the tops.

Ha, another quilt top. No surprise there, right? I don't have the greatest photos here, but the pink blocks are a sweet floral print too.

Hopefully I will make it back again this week, I have a blog book to show you, news about Ginty, and a long sought after quilt.

To be or not to be - a feedsack

 Thank you to everyone for your warm thoughts. I had two super bad days with more than my share of crying, then woke up Friday and decided all I can do is do what I do - get on with it. I can't see a rheumatologist until May 7th to decide if they confirm the RA diagnosis or not, so for now I just wait. Our ped had Grant x-rayed on Thursday and called Friday to say that three doctors looked at the x-rays and see nothing unusual happening with his jaw. He has called a geneticist at Wash U/Children's Hospital to expedite an appointment for us there to see if someone can decide if Grant has that birth defect or not. His words were "I am not at all comfortable waiting a year to see if the baby has something wrong with him or not." To which I say AMEN. I am still hopeful this was yet another rush to judgment on behalf of yet another doctor for Grant and that he will be okay.

Speaking of Grant - he has started rolling all over the living room suddenly. And he is sleeping much easier in his crib at night. AND he can sit up in the shopping cart. Go baby. (So much for that low muscle tone, eh?)

Sammi is utterly in love with "punjob" aka Spongebob. Lord help me, I hate spongebob. She is also doing adorable toddler speak for everything "sammi go bye bye? sammi wear shoes? sammi sleepy." Love.

My Jackson darling, well, he was terribly upset when he got off the bus and found me crying. I am not a crier. Not on purpose, I just don't do it often. So then he started to cry. And wail. Other than that he refuses to get dressed lately. At all. Ever. For anything. It takes HOURS to get him dressed. He was never like this before, what gives?

 I smacked together this umbrella idea from pinterest for the front door. I think I need one more thing in the front of the umbrella, but it's cute. That pink ruffly umbrella is a kid's umbrella from Amazon of all places.

 And we have a bird's nest on the porch. A few hours ago all the eggs were in the nest then when I got the camera out she seems to have tried to discard two  of them. Boo. When Jack was a toddler he LOVED finding baby birds in nests. I hope Sammi likes it too.

 The kids and I went to goodwill on Friday and I grabbed this. I cannot for the life of me decide if it is a feedsack or not.

 It has the rounded corners.

 And fairly large cotton stitching.

But this is the part that throws me off. Someone has made it into a laundry sack. These are really only one grommet split in half. And that string is a cotton string. Obviously people made feedsacks into lots of things, but it still makes me go hmmmm.

So what say you - feedsack or no? Barbara?

This morning I fell down a rabbit hole

This morning I took Grant to the pediatric plastic surgeon for the consult for his facial asymmetry.

I knew looking at the other babies in the waiting room that his head was fine.

What I did not expect was that the doctor would say the asymmetry in his jaw is hemifacial macrosomia.

Go on and google it. Don't google image it.

It's a congenital birth defect.

I remember there being some blah blah followed by come back and see the craniofacial team in a year. (Which includes psychologists and dentists and ENTs and eye doctors and plastic surgeons and audiologists and on and on.)

And then I freaked the fuck out.

After having a little time to freak out I called the ped. I am concerned about making a diagnosis like that without even an x-ray. The ped has scheduled us for a skull series to either confirm or deny the abnormal bone growth in his jaw. If the x-ray shows nothing then we will move on to a neurologist to make sure his facial asymmetry is not from a stroke.

In the middle of that spinning rabbit hole my own doctor called.

 I tested positive for two of the tests I had on Monday to check for rheumatoid arthritis.

And then I freaked the fuck out again.

I have to see a rheumatologist for a diagnosis. (There is a 6 week wait at the first one I was referred to.) But I have crippling pain in my left hand and foot. And have for many months.

So now I am staring down both pelvic prolapse (we all know how positive the internets are about that prospect) and a life long crippling, deforming disease. That will mean meds and on and on.

And the fear of  not being able to take care of the kids I worked so fucking hard for. Or enjoy them because walking is killing me right now.

And never being able to sew again.

I have been here before with infertility, but I am very much having a "why has God forsaken me?" moment.

There you have it.

Me in that god forsaken rabbit hole.

I think I can

Grant keeps trying to INSIST that he cannot sit up.

Silly boy, you totally can! That boppy is not holding you up, I promise. (The ped actually said it offers some babies psychological comfort, which made me chuckle.)

He seems to have totally skipped that gorilla sitting thing the other kids did.

It's been almost a week of sleeping all night in his crib too. After another week I will start working on the naps. He has started rolling all over the place this morning. I guess sleeping flat is helping that skill. The play gym will be on it's way out very soon.

And I just washed a new batch of pajamas for him - in 18 month sizes. Smokes.

Flea Market Sunday

Man, we have had the busiest couple of days. It is so nice to just be at home with just my noisy kids and enjoy a little down time.

It was a quilty kind of junking weekend.

A postage stamp quilt.

My first in that pattern.

A scalloped Texas star.

And a lavender wedding ring.

Some glass garland.

Pieces for a dresden plate quilt.

A giant pile of them in the yummiest 30's fabrics.

A pink tulle Christmas tree complete with a spun cotton angel for the top. I wouldn't even have known what this was all smushed in a box were it not for Laurie .

And something I have wanted since I was pregnant and doing Grant's room - an old playskool abacus toy.

My girl likes to run around the yard in only her diaper now that is warm. And she wants to "cheese samwich" for every picture I am taking. LOL

Grant had his 6 month check up on Friday and he has been referred to physical therapy for some muscle tightness/weakness which makes him lean to the left and to the plastic surgeon to discuss a helmet for some facial asymmetry. We see the plastic surgeon on Wednesday to see what he thinks. I am a bit torn about the whole thing - it's cosmetic, he doesn't have a flat head, but he definitely has a difference from one side of his forehead to the other. We shall see what the doc thinks a helmet would even do for him and decide then I guess. ($$$$$$ out of pocket for that helmet business. Oy.)